First, the boring stuff. This is a blog for legal adults, people 18 years old or older. I like to write about sex, non-monogamy, swinging, polyamory, and other adult topics. Expect plently of X-rated material here, folks, so don’t say you weren’t warned!
This blog is about my thoughts and opinions on the brave (and mostly hidden) world of ethical non-monogamy. Ever since I was aware that there were organized groups that participated in this subculture I have been fascinated by why people want the things they want, and why they choose the things that they do. It is also about my desires and experiences, the ones I have with my wife and also without her. She won’t be writing posts herself, but we share all of our experiences with each other, and ultimately she is always a part of every story.
Sensual refers to the enjoyments experienced through the senses, especially from the gratification or indulgence of physical appetites: a sensual delight in eating; enjoyment of the feel of sunshine, wind, or the touch of a hand on your skin; physical and sexual pleasure, but also much more than that. An Intellectual is a person who places a high value on the more complex forms of knowledge, aesthetic or philosophical matters. [Definitions modified from www.dictionary.com.]
This undoubtedly sounds pretentious, but I named this blog “Sensual Intellectuals” because that is a good description of myself, my wife and I together, and the kind of people we like to meet. I am an intellectual by fundamental mental orientation, and by career; I am a scientist, teach for a living, and have always truly enjoyed thinking and talking analytically about how the world works and why people do the things that they do. And in recent years I have realized to what degree I am also sensual; I enjoy simple physical pleasures like feeling water rushing past my nude body, or sunshine on my face. But I also need the touch of other humans, simply caring, comforting contact as well as physically arousing, sexual touch. Those touches help me to feel calm, and safe, and loved.
I need to meet, talk with, learn about and, yes, engage both mentally and physically with people who also appreciate these same things. My wife and I look for these experiences together, as they are one of the things we most value about our own relationship. But we also experience them separately, with the knowledge and approval of each other.
We are a couple in our 40s, living in the Midwestern United States, who have been married a long time. Our relationship has grown and changed over those many years, especially since we made the choice together to reject traditional monogamy and add to our own experiences with others. This blog is the story of those thoughts, conversations and experiences.